The other night I was invited out for a night with the guys. I told my wife that I would be home by midnight... "I promise!"

Well, the hours passed quickly and the beer was going down way too easily. At 3 a.m., drunk as a skunk, I headed for home. Just as I walked through the door, the cuckoo clock in the hall started up and cuckooed three times.

Quickly, I realized she'd probably wake up, so I cuckooed another nine times. I was really proud of myself for having such a rapid, witty solution, even when smashed, to escape a possible conflict.

The next morning my wife asked me what time I got in, and I told her 12 o'clock. She didn't seem disturbed at all. Got away with that one, I thought!

Then she told me we needed a new cuckoo clock. When I asked her why, she said, "Well, last night it cuckooed three times, then said, 'Oh shoot,' cuckooed four more times, cleared its throat, cuckooed another three times, giggled, cuckooed twice more, and then belched."

Received from Dalton Green.

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