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<P>If you are feeling down today, this ought to lift your spirits. Things COULD be worse.</P>
<P>Frank<BR><BR></P></DIV>
<DIV></DIV>
<DIV></DIV>
<DIV></DIV>
<DIV></DIV>IDIOTS IN SERVICE
<DIV></DIV>This week, My phone went dead and I had to contact the telephone
<DIV></DIV>repair
<DIV></DIV>people. They promised to be out between 8:00 a.m. and 7:00 p.m. When
<DIV></DIV>I
<DIV></DIV>asked if they could give me a smaller time window, the pleasant
<DIV></DIV>gentleman
<DIV></DIV>asked,
<DIV></DIV>"Would you like us to call you before we come?"
<DIV></DIV>I replied that I didn't see how he would be able to do that, since
<DIV></DIV>our
<DIV></DIV>phones weren't working. He also requested that we report future
<DIV></DIV>outages
<DIV></DIV>by
<DIV></DIV>email. I asked him,
<DIV></DIV>"Does YOUR email work without a telephone line?"
<DIV></DIV>
<DIV></DIV>
<DIV></DIV>IDIOTS AT WORK:
<DIV></DIV>I was signing the receipt for my credit card purchase when the clerk
<DIV></DIV>noticed I had never signed my name on the back of the credit card.
<DIV></DIV>She
<DIV></DIV>informed me that she could not complete the transaction unless the
<DIV></DIV>card
<DIV></DIV>was
<DIV></DIV>signed. When I asked why, she explained that it was necessary to
<DIV></DIV>compare
<DIV></DIV>the signature I had just signed on the receipt. So I signed the
<DIV></DIV>credit
<DIV></DIV>card
<DIV></DIV>in front of her. She carefully compared the signature to the one I
<DIV></DIV>had
<DIV></DIV>just
<DIV></DIV>signed on the receipt. As luck would have it,
<DIV></DIV>they matched.
<DIV></DIV>
<DIV></DIV>
<DIV></DIV>IDIOTS IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD
<DIV></DIV>I live in a semi rural area. We recently had a new neighbor call the
<DIV></DIV>local
<DIV></DIV>township administrative office to request the removal of the Deer
<DIV></DIV>Crossing
<DIV></DIV>sign on our road. The reason:
<DIV></DIV>"too many deer were being hit by cars"
<DIV></DIV>and he didn't want them to cross there anymore.
<DIV></DIV>
<DIV></DIV>
<DIV></DIV>IDIOTS IN FOOD SERVICE:
<DIV></DIV>My daughter went to a local Taco Bell and ordered a taco. She asked
<DIV></DIV>the
<DIV></DIV>person behind the counter for minimal lettuce." He said he was sorry,
<DIV></DIV>but
<DIV></DIV>they only had iceberg.
<DIV></DIV>
<DIV></DIV>
<DIV></DIV>IDIOT SIGHTING
<DIV></DIV>I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport
<DIV></DIV>employee
<DIV></DIV>asked, "Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your
<DIV></DIV>knowledge?"
<DIV></DIV>To
<DIV></DIV>which I replied, "If it was without my knowledge, how would I know? "
<DIV></DIV>He
<DIV></DIV>smiled knowingly and nodded, "That's why we ask."
<DIV></DIV>
<DIV></DIV>
<DIV></DIV>IDIOT SIGHTING
<DIV></DIV>The stoplight on the corner buzzes when it's safe to cross the street.
<DIV></DIV>I
<DIV></DIV>was crossing with an intellectually challenged coworker of mine when
<DIV></DIV>she
<DIV></DIV>asked if I knew what the buzzer was for. I explained that it signals
<DIV></DIV>blind
<DIV></DIV>people when the light is red. Appalled, she responded,
<DIV></DIV>"What on earth are blind people doing driving?"
<DIV></DIV>
<DIV></DIV>
<DIV></DIV>
<DIV></DIV>
<DIV></DIV>IDIOT SIGHTING
<DIV></DIV>I work with an individual who plugged her power strip back into
<DIV></DIV>itself
<DIV></DIV>and
<DIV></DIV>for the life of her couldn't understand why her system would not turn
<DIV></DIV>on.
<DIV></DIV>
<DIV></DIV>
<DIV></DIV>IDIOT SIGHTING
<DIV></DIV>When my husband and I arrived at an automobile dealership to pick up
<DIV></DIV>our
<DIV></DIV>car, we were told the keys had been locked in it. We went to the
<DIV></DIV>service
<DIV></DIV>department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the
<DIV></DIV>driver's
<DIV></DIV>side door. As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively
<DIV></DIV>tried
<DIV></DIV>the
<DIV></DIV>door handle and discovered that it was unlocked. "Hey," I announced
<DIV></DIV>to
<DIV></DIV>the
<DIV></DIV>technician, "It's open!" To which he replied, "I know - I already got
<DIV></DIV>that
<DIV></DIV>side."
<DIV></DIV>
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