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Thursday, April 18, 2024 |
More Short Funnies Part 1  
Date: Sent Thursday, May 6, 2021
Category: None | Rating: 4.11/5 (54 votes)
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Telling a person to calm down is about like baptizing a cat.
Prayer is the original wireless communication.
My doctor asked if anyone in my family suffered from mental illness. I said, "No, we all seem to enjoy it."
I thought the dryer made my clothes shrink. Turns out it was the refrigerator.
I thought growing old would take longer.
Went shopping while hungry; now I'm the proud owner of Aisle 6.
Camping: where you spend a small fortune to live like a homeless person.
Just once, I want a username and password prompt to say: "close enough."
Being an adult is the dumbest thing I have ever done.
I'm a multitasker. I can listen, ignore and forget all at the same time!
Went to an antique show and people were bidding on me.
I won't say I'm worn out, but I don't get near the curb on trash day.
People who wonder if the glass is half empty or half full miss the point. The glass is refillable.
Retired: under new management. See spouse for details.
Be the kind of woman who, when your feet hit the floor first thing in the morning, the devil says: "Oh, oh, here she comes."
When you can't find the sunshine...be the sunshine.
Received from Ken Bowers.
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