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Excellent Story Date: Sent Tuesday, October 28, 2003 Category: None

Rating: 2.92/5 (123 votes) Click a button to cast your vote

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Scott Adams, creator of Dilbert, receives many mangled quotes that his readers have overheard. After staring at the list for a while he realized that if he put them together they make an excellent story:

We were sitting on our hands, twiddling our thumbs, when suddenly the door opened. It made the hair on my back stand on end. He was smoking like a fish and swearing like a stuck pig. I could tell from his shifty eyes that he might try to pull the fox over my leg.

"Do you have a pen?" he asked. "I need to make a mental note."

I didn't want him to stick my pen into his ear, but I also didn't think it would be a good idea to rattle the barrel because the monkeys might shoot the fish. So I offered my pen.

"Do you seriously think I came up the river on a banana tree?" he growled before slapping the pen from my hand.

I wanted to fight him, but I already had too many hands in the fire. Still, you have to kill the stone with the bird while you can. He was slow as Moses. I kicked him where the moon don't shine. I didn't want to beat a dead bush, so I waited for his next move. The ball was in his camp now. He didn't look like he had both oars in his basket, but maybe I was trying too hard to read between the tea leaves.

The End

-Scott Adams, Dilbert Newsletter 50.0

Received from Thought for the Day.