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IRS Questions Date: Sent Thursday, April 15, 2004 Category: None

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(For those of you who are not in the United States, the IRS is the Internal Revenue Service. Those are the folks to whom we pay our taxes each April 15th.)

This comes from Donna Patterson Wilson, who answered thousands of IRS-directed questions from an often-confused public. She kept a special list of the strangest of these calls.

Caller: I want to know if I should file married or single.
IRS: Are you married?
Caller: Well, sort of ...
IRS: What?
Caller: Well, we did get married, but we're not counting on it.

Caller: I got a letter from you guys and I want to know what you want.
IRS: What does it say?
Caller: Just a minute, I'll open it.

Caller: I'm a bookkeeper and I need to know if ten $100 bills make a thousand dollars or only ten hundred dollars.
IRS: Both. It's the same amount.
Caller: So why do I get a different answer every time I move the decimal point?

Caller: What does the law say about people who are renting to relatives and taking a loss on the property?
IRS: You are required to charge them fair market value.
Caller: It's very fair. If we rented to someone else we could get a lot more.

Caller: Could you please send me some of those WD-40's?

Received from Thomas S. Ellsworth.