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Saturday, November 23, 2024 |
Think you're having a bad day?  
Date: Sent Friday, September 24, 2004
Category: None | Rating: 4.40/5 (179 votes)
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Think you're having a bad day?
A woman came home to find her husband in the kitchen shaking frantically, almost in a dancing frenzy, with some kind of wire running from his waist
towards the electric kettle. Intending to jolt him away from the deadly current, she whacked him with a handy plank of wood, breaking his arm in two
places. Up to that moment, he had been happily listening to his Walkman.
STILL think you're having a bad day?
Two animal rights protesters were protesting the cruelty of sending pigs to a slaughterhouse in Bonn, Germany. Suddenly, all two thousand pigs broke
loose and escaped through a broken fence, stampeding madly. The two hopeless protesters were trampled to death.
STILL think you're having a bad day?
There was a case in one hospital's Intensive Care ward where patients always died in the same bed, on Sunday morning, at about 11am, regardless of
their medical condition.
This puzzled the doctors and some even thought that it had something to do with the supernatural. No one could solve the mystery as to why the deaths
occurred around 11 a.m. on Sundays.
So a Worldwide team of experts was assembled to investigate the cause of the incidents. The next Sunday morning, a few minutes before 11am, all
doctors and nurses nervously wait outside the ward to see for themselves what the terrible phenomenon was all about. Some were holding wooden crosses,
prayer books and other holy objects to ward off the evil spirits.
Just when the clock struck 11... Pookie Johnson, the part-time Sunday sweeper, entered the ward and unplugged the life support system so that he could
use the outlet for the vacuum cleaner.
Think you're having a bad day?
The average cost of rehabilitating a seal after the Exxon Valdez oil spill in Alaska was $80,000. At a special ceremony, two of the most expensively
saved animals were being released back into the wild amid cheers and applause from onlookers. A minute later, in full view, a killer whale ate them
both.
What? STILL having a bad day?
Iraqi terrorist Khay Rahnajet didn't pay enough postage on a letter bomb. It came back with "return to sender" stamped on it. Forgetting it was the
bomb, he opened it and was blown to bits.
There now, feeling better?
Received from Andychaps The Funnies.
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