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Monday, May 13, 2024 |
EXTRA: This funny is in the 'extra' queue which means it is clean, but not really good enough to be mailed out. Of course, it could be removed or shuffled to another queue at any time. Your votes help us decide if a funny should be mailed out (or not). Please give your opinion by voting. How to Annoy the IRS  
Date: No date scheduled
Category: None | Rating: 4.01/5 (89 votes)
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Well, it's tax time again, boys and girls. So cough it up if you haven't already! But no one says you have to go gently into that dark night. Here are
some hints on how to annoy the IRS if you owe them money:
1. Always put staples in the right-hand corner. Go ahead and put them down the whole right side. The extractors who remove the mail from the envelopes
have to take out any staples on the right side.
2. Never arrange paperwork in the right order, or even facing the right way. Put a few upside down and backwards. That way they have to remove all
your staples, rearrange your paperwork, and re-staple it (on the left side).
3. Line the bottom of your envelope with Elmer's glue and let it dry before you put in your forms so that the automated opener doesn't open it and the
extractor has to open it by hand.
4. If you're very unfortunate and have to pay taxes, use a two- or three-party check. On top of paying with a three-party check, pay one of the
dollars you owe in cash. When an extractor receives cash, no matter how small an amount, he has to take it to a special desk and fill out a few nasty
forms.
5. Write a little letter of appreciation. Any letter received has to be read and stamped, regardless of what it is or what it's on.
6. Write your letter on something misshapen and unconventional, such as the back of a burlap sack.
7. When you mail it, use a big envelope (even if its just a single EZ form). Big envelopes have to be torn and sorted differently than regular
business-size ones. An added bonus to the big envelope is that they take priority over other mail, so the workers can hurry up and deal with your
mess.
8. If you send two checks, they'll have to staple your unsightly envelope to your half-destroyed form.
9. Always put extra paper clips on your forms. Any foreign fasteners or the like have to be removed and put away.
10. Sign your name in ink on every page. Any signature has to be verified and then date stamped.
These are just a few of the fun and exciting things you can do with the IRS. These methods are recommended only when you owe money.
Received from Thomas Ellsworth.
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