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Mom's New Year's Resolutions Six Months Later Date: Sent Monday, April 6, 2009 Category: None

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January 1st: "My children and I will learn Modern Hebrew this year."
July 1st: "My children and I will weekly eat one dozen bagels with lox."

January 1st: "I will get the kids the pet they've always wanted."
July 1st: "I will buy a collar and a leash for my chia plant."

January 1st: "I will make only home-made yogurt from only organic ingredients."
July 1st: "I will allow my children only two Gogurts in their mouth at a time."

January 1st: "I will take my children to a museum once a month."
July 1st: "I will show my kids where I ate super chili dogs in high school."

January 1st: "I will make sure my children eat multi-grain fiber-filled items at each meal."
July 1st: "I will store my bag of Krispy Kreme doughnuts next to a bottle of Metamucil."

January 1st: "I will feature a Van Gogh each month on our coffee table."
July 1st: "I will fill up our van at the Stop and Go."

January 1st: "We will never eat food in the car this year."
July 1st: "We will quit using our gas grill in the car this year."

by Cheryl Moeller
[updated by GCFL]

Cheryl Moeller is a stand up comic, humor columnist, and author. You can read more at www.momlaughs.blogspot.com

Received from Cheryl Moeller.