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Medical funnies
Date: Sent Monday, February 7, 2000
Category: None
Rating: 3.90/5 (123 votes)
Click a button to cast your vote
012345

I was performing a complete physical, including the visual acuity test. I placed the patient twenty feet from the chart and began, "Cover your right eye with your hand." He read the 20/20 line perfectly. "Now your left." Again, a flawless read. "Now both," I requested. There was silence. He couldn't even read the large E on the top line. I turned and discovered that he had done exactly what I had asked; he was standing there with both his eyes covered. I was laughing too hard to finish the exam.

-=+=-

A nurses' aide was helping a patient into the bathroom when the patient exclaimed,"You're not coming in here with me. This is a one-seater!"

-=+=-

During a patient's two week follow-up appointment with his cardiologist, he informed his doctor that he was having trouble with one of his medications. "Which one?", asked the doctor.

"The patch.The nurse told me to put on a new one every six hours and now I'm running out of places to put it!"

The doctor had him quickly undress and discovered what he hoped he wouldn't see....Yes, the man had over fifty patches on his body!

Now the instructions include removal of the old patch before applying a new one.

-=+=-

A nurse caring for a woman from Kentucky asked, "So how's your breakfast this morning?"

"It's very good, except for the Kentucky Jelly. I can't seem to get used to the taste," the patient replied. The nurse asked to see the jelly and the woman produced a foil packet labeled "KY Jelly."

Received from Kim Driggers.


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