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View Funnies Thursday, May 2, 2024

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Big Jake
Date: Sent Friday, August 25, 2000
Category: None
Rating: 3.99/5 (155 votes)
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A pilgrim was walking across the prairie during the days of the Old West when he came across a small town. Passing through the town, he noticed a saloon and decided to stop and quench his thirst. After ordering a beer, he stood at the bar and observed the other clientele in the saloon.

Suddenly the saloon door swung open, and a cowboy came running in yelling "Big Jake's comin'!" Within seconds the establishment had cleared, leaving the pilgrim and his beer alone at the bar. Sure enough, a huge seven-and-a-half foot, 500 pound cowboy came swaggering in, tearing out the front door frame with his broad shoulders.

The cowboy looked around the saloon, marched over to the pilgrim, picked him up by the scruff of the neck, and threw him over the bar, bellowing "Gimme a drink!" The pilgrim complied, placing the almost-full bottle next to the glass on the bar. The cowboy tossed back the drink, then bit the neck off of the bottle and emptied that too.

At that point, the pilgrim, quaking in his boots, asked "Sir, would you care for another?" To which the cowboy replied, "Nope. I gotta go. Big Jake's comin'!"

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