GCFL.net: Good, Clean Funnies List
 Welcome
 How To Help Us
 View Funnies
 Archive Index
 Search Funnies
 Mailing List
 Site Map
 News
 FAQ
 Contact Us
 Reprints

Receive the Daily Funny Email



Funnies Sunday, January 21, 2018

Previous Funny
Previous
Funny
Email to a Friend
Email to
a Friend
Archive Index
Archive
Index
Go to Random Funny
Random
Funny
Printer friendly
Printer
friendly
Next Funny
Next
Funny

Dillerisms
Date: Sent Friday, January 12, 2018
Category: None
Rating: 4.44/5 (63 votes)
Click a button to cast your vote
012345

Quotes from Phyllis Diller.

Whatever you may look like, marry a man your own age. As your beauty fades, so will his eyesight.

Housework can't kill you, but why take a chance?

Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing up is like shoveling the sidewalk before it stops snowing.

The reason women don't play football is because 11 of them would never wear the same outfit in public.

Best way to get rid of kitchen odors: Eat out.

I want my children to have all the things I couldn't afford. Then I want to move in with them.

Any time three New Yorkers get into a cab without an argument, a bank has just been robbed.

We spend the first twelve months of our children's lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve years telling them to sit down and shut up.

Burt Reynolds once asked me out. I was in his room.

What I don't like about office Christmas parties is looking for a job the next day.

My photographs don't do me justice -they just look like me.

The reason the golf pro tells you to keep your head down is so you can't see him laughing.

You know you're old if they have discontinued your blood type.

Received from Margaret Cole.


© Copyright 1996-2018, GCFL.net.
Make a donation with PayPal