|
|
![]() | ![]() |
 |
|
View Funnies |
Friday, November 22, 2024 |
Secret Thoughts of Doctors   
Date: Sent Thursday, January 12, 2006
Category: Doctors | Rating: 3.13/5 (355 votes)
Click a button to cast your vote
|
|
(With apologies to my personal physician... Of course this doesn't apply to you!  )
What the doctor says: "This should be taken care of right away."
What the doctor is thinking: I'd planned a trip to Hawaii next month, but this is so easy and profitable that I want to fix it before it cures
itself.
What the doctor says: "Welllllll, what have we here?"
What the doctor is thinking: He has no idea and is hoping you'll give him a clue.
"Let me check your medical history." -- I want to see if you've paid your last bill before spending any more time with you.
"We have some good news and some bad news." -- The good news is, I'm going to buy that new BMW. The bad news is, you're going to pay for it.
"Let's see how it develops." -- Maybe in a few days it will grow into something that can be cured.
"Why don't we make another appointment later in the week." -- I'm playing golf this afternoon, and this a waste of time. -- I need the bucks, so I'm
charging you for another office visit.
"Let me schedule you for some tests." -- I have a forty percent interest in the lab.
"I'd like to prescribe a new drug." -- I'm writing a paper and would like to use you for a guinea pig.
"If it doesn't clear up in a week, give me a call." -- I don't know what it is. Maybe it will go away by itself.
"That's quite a nasty looking wound." -- I think I'm going to throw up.
"This may hurt a little." -- Last week two patients bit off their tongues.
"Well, we're not feeling so well today, are we?" -- I'm stalling for time. Who are you and why are you here?
"This should fix you up." -- The drug company slipped me some big bucks to prescribe this stuff.
"Everything seems to be normal." -- Rats! I guess I can't buy that new beach condo after all.
"I'd like to run some more tests." -- I can't figure out what's wrong. Maybe the kid in the lab can solve this one.
"There is a lot of that going around." -- That's the third one this week! I'd better learn something about this.
"If those symptoms persist, call for an appointment." -- I've never heard of anything so disgusting. Thankfully I'm off next week.
Received from http://www.cleanfunny.com, a GCFL recommended link.
|
