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Groaner: For The Birds Date: No date scheduled Category: None

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In 1995 or so the pollution in the atmosphere of London had started to kill off all the rooks. And the city government was very concerned because the rooks roosting on the cornices and the odd little crannies of the public buildings were a big attraction. The Yanks with their Kodaks, if you get it. So they said, "What are we going to do?"

They got a lot of brochures from places with climates similar to London's so they could raise the rooks until the pollution problem was finally licked. One place with a similar climate, but low pollution count, turned out to be Bangor, Maine. So they put an ad in the paper soliciting bird fanciers and talked to a bunch of guys in the trade.

Finally, they engaged this one guy at the rate of $50,000 a year to raise rooks. They sent an ornithologist over on the Concorde with two cases of rook eggs packed in shatterproof cases - they kept the shipping compartment constantly heated and all that stuff.

So this guy had a new business, North American Rook Farms, Inc. He went to work right off incubating new rooks so London would not become a rookless city.

The only thing was, the London City Council was really impatient, and every day they sent him a telegram that said: "Bred any good rooks lately?"

(By Stephen King)

Received from Stan Kegel.