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Travel Date: Sent Monday, May 27, 2024 Category: None

Rating: 4.19/5 (36 votes) Click a button to cast your vote

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I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder. - Steven Wright

My fear of flying starts as soon as I buckle myself in and then the guy up front mumbles a few unintelligible words then before I know it I'm thrust into the back of my seat by acceleration that seems way too fast and the rest of the trip is an endless nightmare of turbulence, of near misses. And then the cabbie drops me off at the airport. - Dennis Miller

In Paris, they simply stared when I spoke to them in French; I never did succeed in making those idiots understand their own language. - Mark Twain

In Mexico, everything on the menu is the same dish. The only difference is the way it's folded. - Billy Connolly

Seasickness: at first you are so sick you are afraid you will die, and then you are so sick you are afraid you won't die. - Mark Twain

A sure cure for seasickness is to sit under a tree. - Spike Mulligan

I like terra firma. The more firma, the less terra. - George S. Kaufman

A tourist is a fellow who drives thousands of miles so he can be photographed standing in front of his car. - Emile Ganest

I've been to almost as many places as my luggage. - Bob Hope

Received from Wayne Onaka.