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View Funnies Saturday, November 23, 2024

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Kids Are Hilarious 3 of 3
Date: Sent Friday, April 21, 2023
Category: None
Rating: 4.25/5 (56 votes)
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We got home and my four-year-old just tossed his backpack and cup down on the floor, flopped on the couch, turned on Bluey and said, "Whew! What a day."

When my daughter was seven-years-old, she once interrupted a bedtime story to tell me, "In a pie eating contest, it doesn't matter if you win or lose because you get to eat pie." I think about that a lot.

My favorite kid I ever taught when I was a swim teacher was this little four-year-old Italian boy. One time he sneezed and nobody said anything, so he just went, "What? No 'bless you' for Giacomo?"

I asked my son if he could go anywhere in the world, where would he go. He said, "McDonald's." I said, "No, I mean a country." He said, "Oh OK... McDonald's in Japan."

My ten-year-old carefully packed everything she'd need for a week-long trip to Grandma's house. Then she forgot her bag in her room. Guess who got a shopping spree for all new clothes? I'm pretty sure she planned this.

On the first day of school, my six-year-old told me about his art teacher, Mr. McClay. This week, I found out his name is actually Mr. Mitchell. It turns out my kid has been calling him McClay because he thinks that's a better name for an art teacher.

My six-year-old asked, "Why are they called speed bumps if they slow you down? They should be called slow bumps." I'm amazed how someone with a ten-second attention span is so insightful.

Dad: "Guess what time it is?"
Kid: "I don't have to guess. I can read a clock."
Dad: "It's time to clean your room."
Kid: "No, it's 9:23."

I collect all the cell phones and iPads from the kids at night and keep them in my room. Last night they all set alarms to go off at various times throughout the night. I'm impressed with their ingenuity and team effort. But they're still all grounded.

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